In the morning I head off to Darwin for a couple of days. I had a delightful day with Nicholas and Audrey today. It feels as though it has been a while since I had a day where I didn't need to discipline someone, or to nag anybody to listen to what I was saying.
Audrey had ballet this morning, Nicholas and I had coffee (and juice for him) while we waited for her class to end. Then we went to the primary school fete. Not much else was done. It was nice.
I have the two most recent Country Style magazines, I have my Isabel Dalhousie. And a stack of work preparation to read, but will have time on my side. When I get home I am keen to catch up on some craft posts. I feel I've had a resurgence of inspiration and need to get the sewing machine out. Lots if catching up to do.
If you are going to celebrate turning 40, what not celebrate again... and again... and again.
Since last Thursday I have had two morning teas, one afternoon tea and two dinners.
Melanie, of course, planned a beautiful dinner. With mum and David helping, we had the loveliest of family dinners. I had only wanted a barbecue with the family to mark the occasion. Melanie included my favourite things.
We had gorgeous table settings including place cards and conversation cards. It was lots of fun, with lots of laughter and lots of love.
Apparently there is a saying in France, “Elegance is the privilege of age”. I think that will be my mantra for this year. Tomorrow when I wake up I will be 40. And I can think of plenty of elegant french women who are older than 40! Contrary to what some people think, I don't find the thought daunting at all. I feel grown up. mature, in a good way. I expect I will feel differently this time in ten years from now!
I think it is about being comfortable n your own skin. With who you are and where you are in life. In my 20's I achieved the degree I had wanted since the 5th grade. I travelled a bit, visiting the United States, United Kingdom, Amsterdam, Thailand, Papua New Guinea and Fiji. In my thirties I married had children and bought a house. So I'll see what the 40's bring.
I am working tomorrow, there isn't much point staying home on my own when everyone else will be at school or work! besides which, there is a lot going on at work and I need to be there and I want to be a part of how things are playing out. I also need to return the "briefcase". I could pretend I am in the movie Ronin. Only without the car chases and guns. Besides,I know what was in the briefcase. :)
There will be celebrations with family and friends over the next couple of days. For now, I've toasted the last slice of my zucchini bread and made coffee. I'll watch one of my favourite movies before making Nicholas and Audrey cake for afternoon tea... and maybe tomorrow morning buy a croissant and pretend I am in Paris on my birthday. ;)
Quite appropriately I came across this quote today:
“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else, means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”
ok, so this post is going to be quick. It is more like a brain dump. The many thoughts in my head are starting to collide. Which in a round about way means they are starting to all fall into place. I am reading another Isabel Dalhousie novel. It is called the Right Attitude to rain. On the back cover McCall Smith writes: "The key to contentment in the Scottish climate is the right attitude to rain - just as in life the key to happiness lies in making the best of what you have." Reading that this morning while on the bus made me smile. It kind of links up with yesterdays post about gratitude. Funnily enough, Mel blogged about the same thing at the same time. We both laughed on the phone as we were talking about this beautiful clip we had seen. Then to realise it was the same one!
But more on being grateful for the things we so often take for granted. I watched the following clip tonight.
A lump came to my throat. I cried for her simple joy.
Then I watched an interview on Ellen. I cried again. She spoke of the joy of hearing music clearly. hearing rain and thunder, birds and her husband snore. Her blog can be found here.
So what is all this telling me? It is all in my attitude. Be grateful for where I am in this life journey. Be grateful for what I have and be more present in the now. Not thinking of tomorrow, not thinking of next year. How much more would I see if I wasn't always worried about "stuff".
Should I be surprised?
Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Luke 12:27
I've been lying low of late. No real reason. Work has been busy, demanding, challenging and extremely rewarding over the past couple of weeks. It has been a long time since I have felt energised by my work. Amazing how simple working on alleviating the possibility of a country spiraling into chaos can be when compared with trying to get a 4 year old to eat!I've been dealing with some small parenting issues. Just behavioural things, nothing big, but things that need addressing in any case.
The subject of greater common good has continued to occupy a space in my mind. I was reminded of an essay Arundhati Roy wrote on the subject. I was reminded of a time when everything I did seemed to have that goal as a priority. the saying "the hubris of the young" comes to mind. (I am still 'young'.)
So between work, children, motherhood, home life and things philosophical, my mind has been swimming with thoughts on SO many things. Not to mention trying to find time to reflect on what turning 40 means for me.
However, a couple of things have come up in different places that have got me thinking that they are all pointing to the reflective path I find myself on. A few weeks ago David commented to me after we had been to a dinner party that I didn't talk very much while there (it was a party with my colleagues in celebration of our founding boss' retirement). I said that I felt like being "silent". I don't mean being mute in the company of others, but I have a desire to listen more to the conversations going on around me.
Both Ali Edwards and Amanda Soule have referenced this, from TEDtalks, on their blogs. It is simply beautiful. I think my soul is truly yearning for things that are stripped back to the basic of needs. I don't mean denying myself of anything I might like, but being grateful for the things that I have, for the things around me that I take for granted (like water from the tap, light from electricty) rather than constantly focusing on my materialistic WANTS. To think more of this day as One Day.
